Come Back
by ToastWeaselofDOOM
Summary: Eddie comes back from Vietnam to find that life as he knows it has moved on. Moviesical.


**Note:** The home front was called Disneyland by Vietnam soldiers because it seemed like perfection compared to the hellhole of Vietnam.

A lot of soldiers came back from the war with all kinds of PTSD, and found upon their return that not only had the world had moved on without them, but they were often not welcome back at home because of their soldier status. Already overcome with survivors guilt and PTSD, and with nowhere to turn to, many soldiers fell into drugs and alcohol to try to cope with their depression. Some ultimately committed suicide.

**_This fic includes suicide, death, PTSD, and gory war flashbacks. If any of these trigger you, proceed with caution._**

* * *

_" Where do you go? I don't know…I don't know… I don't know….how to come back…"_

_/_

_"It's okay. I stopped waiting. I'm okay…"_

* * *

"Eddie…" A shocked stared, the tub of empty dishes on her hip falling slack.

"Hi, Rose…"

"I never heard from you…" The anger bubbled up, then was replaced with a resigned sigh. "I didn't know if you were alive or…"

The Marine looked at his feet. "…I'm sorry."

"It's okay. I stopped waiting. I'm okay…"

Eddie swallowed and shuffled forward. "I don't know why them…." He held out his arm, where two new blue bee tattoos sat swollen on his forearm. "Why not me?"

"Oh, Eddie…" She set the tub down and reached forward, then withdraw her hand. "I'm…I'm so sorry…"

A long paused, then she stepped forward and pulled him into a gentle embrace. She held him close, all the words neither of them could say put into that hug. "Welcome home…"

"….Rose! Why are you huggin' that baby killer?"

Eddie felt the waitress stiffen and he pulled back, away from her. Almost immediately he looked up, assessing the new threat—the new person, he corrected himself. There were no threats in Disneyland.

The new person was a man, as tall as him, but scrawny, with glasses and a blonde mullet. He wore jeans and a button up plaid jacket over a t-shirt bearing an Anti-Vietnam slogan. He got up in Eddie's face, wrapping an arm protectively around Rose's waist as a sneer twisted his bookish features.

"Get out. We don't like your kind around here."

"James, stop!" Rose scolded, pulling away from him and shoving him. "Eddie is a friend."

"Eddie?" 'James' turned and scowled at the soldier. "This _that _Eddie?"

"Yes…"

James' face contorted into a snarl. "And you have the gall to show up here after what you did to my Rose?"

That made Eddie frown. "Rose isn't _your _anything."

"She's my girlfriend, isn't she?"

Blue eyes widened. "Your—"

"That's what happens when you don't write for three years, baby killer. People move on."

"I—" Eddie looked at Rose helplessly. She was staring at the wall, desperately trying not to make eye contact. The knot in Eddie's stomach tightened painfully—he felt like he'd been punched.

James smirked. You could cut the tension with a knife.

Finally Rose spoke up. "Do you want a coffee, Eddie?"

Eddie was shocked by the question. "I—yeah, that'd be…swell."

The waitress smiled softly and went off towards the counter. As soon as she was out of earshot, James stepped forward.

"Listen here, baby killer. I'm well aware of your history with Rose, and if you try anything with her, you'll have to face up to me."

Eddie was about to open his mouth and say he'd fought worse, but at that moment Rose came back with a cup of coffee. "Here—I didn't know if you still liked sugar or not, because a lot of soldiers who come back like it black so I didn't—"

"I don't care." Eddie dug in the pocket of his fatigues for his wallet. "How much—"

"It's on the house," Rose said.

James inflated indignantly. "Baby—"

"Eddie is a friend first, not a soldier," Rose said cuttingly, glaring daggers at her boyfriend. "Now I'm going to sit and have a talk with him, and you're going to go and get us two Number Fives from the back with the works, and then man the register."

The blond scowled but turned and went to disappear behind the counter. Rose took Eddie's arm and the soldier jumped about a mile high at the touch.

"Do you want to sit down?"

Eddie nodded. Rose went over to a two person table and pointedly sat with her back towards James. Eddie sat down on the other side. He shifted awkwardly. "How—how are you, Rose?"

The waitress smiled softly. "I'm fine. You?" Eddie shook his head, and Rose changed the subject. "Where are you staying?"

"The base…I'm not officially discharged yet."

Chocolate-colored eyes widened. "You came all the way out here from Alameda?"

"I…I wanted to see you…"

Rose flushed a bit and mussed with the sugar and salt on the table. Eddie stared at the tabletop. Their awkward silence was broken by James, who came back over and sat two sandwiches on plates with a clatter in front of them. "Two Number Fives, the works."

"Thank you," the waitress replied coolly, not looking at her boyfriend. James scowled and stomped off.

"He seems friendly."

Rose sighed. "Don't start…please don't."

Eddie swallowed guiltily and switched his gaze to the sandwich that had been placed in front of him. "What is it?"

"Turkey and ham on rye with fresh tomatoes, onions, and lettuce…and a little bit of mustard and mayo. The fries are hand cut." Rose smiled softly. "I thought you'd be hungry."

"Starving…"

"Then eat up. It's on the house, too."

Eddie reached for the sandwich and slowly took a bite. After three years of Army mess food and rations, it tasted heavenly. Rose idly ate her fries, watching him.

"Are you…you said you were being discharged."

Eddie swallowed his second bite of sandwich and looked bitter. "The Marines don't need a cripple…"

"Oh…" Rose twirled the little toothpick that held the sandwiches together. "Are you…do you have a job lined up?"

A sullen shake of the head as Eddie stuffed the last bit of one half of the sandwich in his mouth.

"Oh…I'm sorry."

A thick swallow. "I'll find something…" Eddie looked around, desperately trying to find something to change the subject. "Where's your Ma?"

The waitress bit her lip, and Eddie knew instantly it was the wrong thing to say. "She…she passed away."

"I'm…I'm sorry to hear that."

"It's okay… it took her very sudden the…the cancer. There was very little they could do for her."

Eddie reached for his coffee and took a large gulp. There was very little they could have done for Boland and Bernstein either after the ambush, not with both of them imbedded with shrapnel, missing limbs, screaming for—

His coffee mug was set down loudly on the table. He was suddenly not hungry. "I…I should go…."

Dark eyes widened. "But you just got here!"

"It's a long way back to Alameda."

Rose sighed "I'll…I'll get you a bag for that, okay? Don't move."

She got up and walked past James, scooting behind the counter and reaching for a container set on the top. She came back and helped Eddie put his food in the box, then as an afterthought added the rest of her food, too.

"We don't have anything for the coffee, sorry."

"It's fine…" The soldier stood, then downed the rest of his coffee. He glanced over at the till and found James glowering at him. "I'm…I need to go."

Rose walked him to the trolley stop, carrying his boxed meal. As they watched the trolley coming towards them in the distance, she squeezed Eddie's arm. He looked at her. "I'm real sorry about James, Eddie."

Eddie wondered if that was more than an apology for her boyfriend's attitude.

"He's generally really nice…"

"He just isn't nice to baby killers. Got it."

A sigh. "I've told him not to talk like that." The trolley pulled up, and Eddie reached into his fatigues for his wallet so he could pay the fare. He started to step on and Rose handed him his food.

"Look, don't be a stranger, alright? Come by anytime."

"…Sure thing, Rose."

Rose smiled and stepped down so the trolley could leave. Eddie found a seat and sat down, staring down at his boxed lunch.

.

.

.

It took him an hour long trolley ride, then a thirty minute bus ride, to get back over to the base. He went back to his small barrack room and set the sandwiches and fries at the foot of his bunk. He thought of the food, where it had came from, and the fact that the only reason he had survived the war in the first place was now in a relationship with someone else.

Eddie scowled and reached under his bed, pulling out an Army issue metal trunk. He flipped the catch and pulled out a six pack of beer. Strong hands grabbed one, twisted the top off, and he chugged half of it in one go.

Alcohol always made things better. Alcohol always let him forget.

* * *

"Rose Fenny?"

The woman turned, surprised to see three soldiers standing at the entrance of her shop. She had just opened for the morning and had not expected any customers quite yet. She looked around—her boyfriend was nowhere to be found.

She wiped her hands and stepped down off to them. "How can I help you gentlemen?"

"Were you familiar with Corporal Eddie Birdlace?"

Rose nodded, a knot forming in the pit of her stomach. She had not seen or heard from him in a week. "Yes…what did he do?"

"I'm very sorry to have to inform you, ma'am, but Corporal Birdlace killed himself last night at approximately zero-two hundred."

"I—what?" Rose's heart raced. Surely not her Eddie?!

"He left letters for you. We found your address on the inside of an empty sandwich container on his bedside table." The lead soldier handed her a stack of letters, their envelopes dirty and a bit worn, all tied together with twine.

The one on top was brilliantly white, obviously brand new. It had her name on it—she could see it under the twine. Rose took the bundle with shaking hands.

"H-How—?"

"His death is still under investigation, but there was a gun in his hand, and the preliminary findings suggested he committed suicide."

Rose felt faint.

"Corporal Birdlace was a fine soldier and a good man who served his country with distinction. The U.S. military would like to express its greatest sympathy for your loss."

"I—thank you…."

The lead soldier nodded and after a moment, the three turned to leave. Rose sat down, weak-kneed, at the closest table. She looked at the now slightly crumpled envelopes in her hands, with her name written on the top in an untidy scrawl.

Eddie's handwriting. She had never seen it before, but she could tell it was his. It fit him perfectly—just a little bit messy.

She started to shake, and then without warning, she started to sob. She clutched the unopened letters to her chest and bawled until James came running from the back, demanding to know what was wrong.

Rose flung her arms around her boyfriend neck without ceremony. "Oh, _Eddie._.."

James' looked at the letters, looked at his distraught girlfriend, and understood. His arms wrapped around her tightly and held her as she cried for her lost soldier.


End file.
